How we learned about sex will largely dictate what we believe about sex. In this lesson, we discuss three possible environments that taught us what to believe about sex and what message they taught us. We will then tackle three common lies we may believe about the nature of God by discovering the truth that represents Him in scripture. Through these exercises, we discover that God is not angry, distant, or indifferent, but is an approachable, caring Father who wants to be present to teach His children how to manage their sexuality well.
Lesson 2: SEX+IDENTITY
We must understand the way God, the Creator of sex, understands sex, so we can view it rightly. God has a big ‘YES’ regarding sex and a protective ‘NO’ in place for our success. Father God has given us powerful sex drives on purpose! But, with great power, comes great responsibility. In this lesson, we discuss that God gives us the ability to make choices for ourselves in order that we might experience freedom and relationship with Him. Because our choices are the outward appearance of our inward beliefs, we also discuss five foundational truths that help us further understand God’s nature and strengthen our identity as His children, resulting in us making healthy, powerful choices.
Lesson 3: SEX+THE BODY—Part 1
This first half of a two-part lesson finally dives into the dynamic effects of sex on our physical bodies, as well as the emotional realm of our souls. This countercultural sex-talk proves that sex is not merely a physical encounter, but an all-encompassing act that was created by God not only to make babies or for pleasure, but for us to experience deep, multidimensional union with another human being. In his lesson, we scientifically discuss that at the point of arousal, a hormonal chain-reaction begins within our brains and bodies, which is meant to lead us from arousal to climax, motivating us toward sex by various levels of chemical (hormonal) reward. In light of this, we investigate where and how to draw sexual boundary lines for ourselves by understanding our own bodies and what we are aroused by. (Note: While the language in this lesson is used scientifically, it is more explicit than previous lessons. We will be defining sex (vaginal, anal, oral), arousal, and orgasm, though these are not the focal points of the lesson.)
Lesson 4: SEX+THE BODY—Part 2
In the concluding lesson of SEX+THE BODY, we learn that each part of our being (spirit, soul, body) has specific needs that must be met for us to thrive spiritually, emotionally, and physically. In this lesson, we focus on the needs of our spirits and souls, because, “when we get our soul and spirit needs met, our physical needs quiet down,” and our sex drives become manageable. We discuss what our needs are and what sources we should go to in order to get them filled. We also discuss that abusing these sources or using them inappropriately has negative outcomes, which may include sexually inappropriate and unhealthy, addictive behaviors. The basic principle is this: when we do not get our spiritual needs met by God, first and foremost, our bodies and emotions begin to rule our lives as we subconsciously compensate for the lack in our souls and spirits. A spirit-led person is a healthy, pure person!
Lesson 5: SEX + RESTORATION
We have all made decisions that we wish we hadn’t. And all too often, we let regret, shame, and fear be the loudest voice in our lives, especially when it comes to our sexuality. In this lesson, we take an honest look at the effects sexual sin has on us and why, but we don’t stop there! In our discussion, we look at the great hope and plan God has for restoration in each part of our being—spirit, soul and body. Though sexual sin has consequences in each of these realms of our being, Jesus’ sacrifice and forgiveness makes full restoration available to those who turn to Him in repentance. There is a fresh start available for every part of everyone. This includes the healing of our connection with Him, our emotions, our memories, and even our physical bodies, making us like new! (Note: In this lesson, we talk about soul-ties, a connection formed between people, especially through sexual relationships. These can be both healthy and beneficial and unhealthy and destructive. This lesson also emphasizes the topic of premarital sex.)
Lesson 6: SEX + COVENANT
Our focus in lesson six? Covenant, self-awareness, accountability, community, vision. Our last session will be spent setting vision for a life of holiness and getting tools to help us practically walk in (sexual) purity! We are not asking our teens to “kiss dating goodbye” or to take a vow of chastity for life, but instead, are asking them to learn themselves and begin to manage getting their needs met in a healthy way; remember, we often make poor sexual choices because we are trying to meet our needs in inappropriate, ineffective, or unhealthy ways. With that in mind, we start our conversation with the understanding that we absolutely need God’s grace as well as His ability, resources, and support to be pure. We can do nothing without Him but we can do all things through His strength! We will invite the students to begin to walk in covenant with God. This will mean saying ‘YES’ to some things and ‘NO’ to others; this is how to build a pure life! We will finish our series by creating individual purity plans which will act as roadmaps to lead us in success to our goals for purity, wholeness, and sex!